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KRAD's Inaccurate Guide to Life
ramblings from a mad fedora'd writer
We look back at the historic first season of Trek. The TOS Rewatch does the season 1 overview.

An excerpt:
What Star Trek did do that was radical for the time was an impressive selection of color-blind casting. In an era where being white was often the default, it was encouraging to see casting choices where race was irrelevant. Beyond the obvious (George Takei and Nichelle Nichols), you’ve got the characters of Stone in “Court Martial,” Boma in “The Galileo Seven,” the personnel officer in “Court Martial,” Masters in “The Alternative Factor,” and Zahra in “Operation—Annihilate!” who are all non-white characters, and their being non-Caucasian is utterly irrelevant to the character and/or storyline.

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Current Music: "Up on Cripple Creek" by The Band

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While the print edition won't be released in trade paperback until 'round Hallowe'en or so, the audio edition of the third V-Wars anthology Night Terrors is now available! My story "Streets of Fire," a sorta-kinda sequel to "The Ballad of Big Charlie" in V-Wars, is read by two different narrators, which is kinda cool. Overall, it's an excellent production. You can order it from Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

Current Mood: happy happy
Current Music: "Woe" by Tom Waits

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Several dear friends of mine have new releases, and I want to highlight three of them in particular.

My sister from another mister, Laura Anne Gilman, has a new book out, the first in her "Devil's West" series, Silver on the Road, a historical fantasy type thing (it's hard to pigeonhole this, which is part of the appeal). Laura Anne has been gripped by this project since she first conceived it, and I've been loving hearing her talk about it, and am really looking forward to finally reading it. Laura Anne is an amazing stylist and a superb world builder, and based on the bits I've read, those skills are on overdrive for this. (Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Indie Bound)

David Mack is best known for his Star Trek fiction, but he's done other stuff, too, including an original historical fantasy of his own that'll be out some time in the next year or so from Tor Books. Meanwhile, anyone who's read Dave's Trek work or his Wolverine novel Road of Bones would know that Dave was born to write Jack Bauer -- and now he has! The second of three 24: Live Another Day novels that take place between the last season of 24 and the LAD miniseries, Rogue is an exciting adventure taking place in Somalia and involving corrupt military officers, Russian intelligence, Somali pirates, and a fantastic Australian intelligence agent who works with Bauer. If you're a fan of Kiefer Sutherland shouting, "DROP IT! DROP IT, NOW!" then you need to get this book. (Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Indie Bound)

Finally, this past week Wrenn and I got to attend the book launch/reading in the Red Room downtown of Ilana C. Myer's Last Song Before Night. This is a standalone fantasy, Ilana's debut novel, and based on the reading Ilana did last week, it's a lovely bit of world-building where magic and poetry are intertwined, a notion that has this old English major salivating. (Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Indie Bound)

Yes, Ilana, Dave, and Laura Anne are all good friends, but they're also good writers, and you should definitely check these books out.

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Current Music: "Rest for the Weary" by Marc Cohn

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We debut the Bat-rewatch with the Riddler, the Mole Hill Gang, underground lairs, the Batusi, lots of driving around the hills, and the World's Fair! We kick it all off with "Hi Diddle Riddle"/"Smack in the Middle."

An excerpt:
We get our first look at all the regular toys—the Bat-cave, the Bat-mobile (with its emergency Bat-turn-lever and Bat-ray projector and hidden Bat-laser beam), the Bat-phone (the one in Gordon’s office, the one in Wayne Manor, and the bat-shaped one in the Bat-mobile), the Bat-signal, and the Bat-a-rang so they can Bat-climb up the wall. We also get the Bat-laser gun that Batman uses to undo the cage over the window, the Bat-hook that he hangs it on, because Robin shouldn’t just drop the cage to the ground from that height (“Pedestrian safety!”), the Bat-scope (which Robin can use to spy on the discotheque in a manner that is probably illegal), the Batostat Anti-Fire Activator, the Bat-gauge, and of course the Bat-cuffs.

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Current Music: "Rag Doll" by Aerosmith

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The trilogy that has no name. Well, okay, it has a name, I just can't say what it is. Anyhow, Book 1 is done and approved by the licensor, and Book 2 is due mid-month, so I really need to start writing it and stuff. Book 3 will be due some time around 1 December, probably. Need to work that out.

SCPD. I just turned "Send in the Clones" in to Danielle Ackley-McPhail and Greg Schauer, the editors of The Side of Good/The Side of Evil. I also have another SCPD project in the development phase. Can't really talk about it yet, but it will be really cool if it happens.

Dragon Precinct. Yes, I know, I still have to finish "Baker's Dozen." *sigh* And I have to write Mermaid Precinct. And I have another short story idea to kickstart. Wheeeee!

Cassie Zukav. I've turned in "William Did It" to Jessica Brawner at Story of the Month Club, and she seems to like it. The complete Cayo Hueso novella will be part of a Story Bundle later this month.

Stargate SG-1. The revision of Kali's Wrath is with Sally Malcolm at Fandemonium. Next step is her edits, and then MGM's feedback. With luck, the novel will be out early next year.

Heroes Reborn. Save the Cheerleader, Destroy the World was approved by James Middleton, who it turns out is the second-to-the-last guy listed in the producer credits, second only to Tim Kring. So, basically, the novella was approved by the guy who's second only to the creator of the friggin' show. That doesn't suck. Still waiting for the final okay by NBC, but I'm hoping that's a formality given that the novella was approved by the guy who's second only to the creator of the friggin show. :)

Pseudonymous novellas. These are running late. Sigh.

Urban fantasy. A small press has evinced an interest in this, so the sample chapters and outline have gone off to them, and we shall see what happens.

V-Wars. "Streets of Fire" will be showing up in Night Terrors some time this month from IDW.

I think that's all the main stuff........

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Current Music: "Get Up Jake" by The Band

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Father Francis Corry died recently, and today was his funeral. He was a classmate and good friend of my mother at Cardinal Spellman High School in the 1960s and he was on the faculty of Spellman when I attended in the 1980s. Among other things, he was the faculty advisor on the school newspaper The Pilot, for which I wrote regularly, and you could argue that he was my first editor.

My mother actually dated him a few times, but mostly they were just close friends. Mommy was never really surprised that he became a priest.

The first things I ever wrote for publication was for The Pilot -- I wrote movie reviews, mostly. One of the things Fr. Corry always told me was never to be afraid of using my vocabulary. "If people don't recognize a word, that's what dictionaries are for."

Every once in a while in the life of a writer, you write something that you're inordinately proud of, something that you look at and say, "Yeah, that's some good shit." The first time I experienced that was in high school, and Fr. Corry was responsible for it. Fr. Shelley, one of the history teachers -- and one of my favorite teachers ever -- was leaving Spellman for a post at Catholic University, and Fr. Corry, knowing what high regard I held him in, asked me to write a tribute to him. I'm still proud of that piece thirty years later, and I owe it to Fr. Corry.

The funeral -- well, it was as good as a funeral could be. My mother and I attended, and there was a large contingent from Spellman, even though he hasn't been on the faculty there since before the turn of the century, and there were a ton of priests there as well. Fr. Corry had been a parish priest of late, and usually Cardinal Dolan runs funerals of parish priests, but he's in Rome right now, so he sent a very nice letter (and also promised to have a mass for him at St. Peter's when he gets back home). Best of all, though, the priest who gave the eulogy is someone who's known Fr. Corry since he was ordained. I always hate it when I go to a funeral, and the person giving the eulogy knows nothing about the person who died. It results in a Mad Libs eulogy where empty platitudes are spoken with the names of the deceased crowbarred in unconvincingly. That was not the case here, and the eulogy was touching and sweet and heartfelt.

Fr. Corry was a fantastic teacher, a brilliant man, from all accounts an excellent priest, and a good egg and the world is poorer for his passing.

Current Mood: sad sad
Current Music: the Yankees-Red Sox game on YES

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Kirk's brother and sister-in-law die and Spock finds out that you'll go blind if you do that. The first season comes to a close with both an em-dash and and exclamation point as the TOS Rewatch does "Operation--Annihilate!"

An excerpt:
On top of that, the artificial suspense of Spock’s blindness is tired. Leonard Nimoy is second in the opening credits and at this point was the most popular character on the show by a lot. There was no way he was going to stay blind. To make matters worse, the blindness was unnecessary (McCoy couldn’t wait ten minutes for the lab results?) and was handwaved in the most pathetic manner possible. The entire season has shown that Spock basically knows everything and has also gone to great lengths to show us how proud he is of his Vulcan heritage—yet he somehow totally forgets about the inner eyelid? Seriously?

Current Mood: tired tired
Current Music: "Mr. Bad Example" by Warren Zevon

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Today I'm meeting up with my friend Catelynn, who's going to overhaul my web site. She's taking a class in web design, and my site is what she's going to do as her project. This works out nicely for everyone because it forces a deadline on me and it won't cost me anything! Honestly, the lack of time and funds has been what's kept me from updating the horribly out-of-date DeCandido.net years ago. (Catelynn accurately called it "a hot mess.")

Also today I need to write my story for The Side of Good/The Side of Evil, "Send in the Clones." Once that's done, I dive into the second book of the trilogy. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...........

In addition, my afterschool karate programs have started back up. Those are going okay so far, though holidays have messed with the regular schedule -- I'm now teaching Mondays and Thursdays, and while I'm glad I'm not doing it on back to back days anymore (it was Wednesdays and Thursdays last year), there are a lot more Monday holidays. In this case, I lost teaching days to Labor Day, Rosh Hashannah, and Yom Kippur. Still, I've got a few new kids, a bunch of returning kids, and just in general that seems to be going well.

Current Mood: busy busy
Current Music: "Town Without Pity" by the Brian Setzer Orchestra

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So way back in the 1990s, I was enough of an X-Files fan that I actually helped run two (very small) relaxacons that were XF focused, my one and only time ever being involved in the running of a convention. I was a huge fan, and when the opportunity to pitch a tie-in novel presented itself, I pitched. (It wasn't taken. Neither were any of the hundred or so that various writers pitched, and we weren't permitted to pitch a second time. It was weird.)

Anyhow, it's now many many years later, and Jonathan Maberry has edited a bunch of X-Files anthologies for IDW, the first of which a) is out and b) I have a story in. (You can order it from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Indie Bound.)

All that's preparing the ground for the new X-Files miniseries that's debuting in January. FOX just released a teaser:

Current Mood: geeky geeky
Current Music: "Just Come Down for the Weekend" by Michael McCloud

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Sometimes known as "Bird's the Word" due to the repetition of that particular phrase, this song has been greatly associated of late with New York Yankees first baseman Greg Bird, who has filled in for Mark Teixeira brilliantly. Bird's name came up in a lot of trade talks, but the Yanks held onto him, and he's proven to be a very good player. When we went to the game Saturday, and they announced the lineups, the loudest cheers were, naturally, for Alex Rodriguez, but the second loudest were for Bird.

Anyhow, in honor of the new kid on the block, here's the Trashmen doing their patter song about a surfin' bird that everyone's talkin' 'bout.......

Current Mood: awake awake
Current Music: "Like a Rolling Stone" by John Mellencamp

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Now that the Stargate Rewatch is done, my new Friday rewatch for Tor.com will be "Holy Rewatch, Batman!" which will look at the 1966 Batman TV series starring Adam West. Look for it to commence next Friday with "Hi Diddle Diddle"/"Smack in the Middle."

Details on how the rewatch will be structured can be found at the link, but it will follow a similar pattern to my other Tor.com rewatches.

So tune in next week, same Bat-time, same Bat-channel!

(No, I couldn't resist. That is to say, I totally could have resisted, but I chose not to.)

Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: "My Baby" by Columbus Short

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McCoy goes back in time and changes history, so Kirk and Spock follow him to make right what once went wrong -- which is bad news for Joan Collins and Kirk's love life... The TOS Rewatch visits "The City on the Edge of Forever."

An excerpt:
What makes this episode so great is what makes the best Star Trek episodes great: it’s about people. Kirk isn’t just saving history, he’s saving history by allowing the violent death of a woman he’s come to love. The stakes are both large in terms of the course of history, and small in terms not only of Kirk’s feelings, but also allowing a great woman to die before her time. Because Keeler is a great woman, even though her work in 1930 only affects a few down-on-their-luck people in lower Manhattan. But her compassion is what enables three time-displaced Starfleet officers to even survive in the first place. Yet it’s never that simple. As Spock says, her desire for peace is absolutely the right thing, but at entirely the wrong time, as war was the only way the Third Reich and its allies were going to be stopped.

Current Mood: geeky geeky
Current Music: "Little Beggar Man" by Arlo Guthrie

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The Who By Numbers has always been my favorite album by The Who. Who's Next is probably their best, and certainly their best known, but I like the musicianship and the intensity of the lyrics on Numbers more.

It is also one cynical-ass album. There's a lot of bitterness in Pete Townshend's lyrics on this one. And here's one of the most cynical, as it's about the rise of The Who from a bunch of kids in England who want to become rock stars to actually becoming rock stars, and it's nowhere near what they thought. ("Back to the studio to make our latest number one / Take two hundred and seventy-six, you know this used to be fun.")

Current Mood: awake awake
Current Music: "Success Story" by The Who

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Heroes Reborn debuts tonight on NBC, and there are six novellas coming out alongside the TV series, the fifth of which is written by me and entitled Save the Cheerleader, Destroy the World. It's scheduled to be released on 20 November, but you can preorder it (and the other five) now! Book 1 -- which is an adaptation of the first episode, Brave New World by David Bishop -- will go live tomorrow, and the rest will be released every two weeks over the course of the next two-and-a-half months. (All the release dates are Friday, the day after an episode of the show airs Thursday night.)

Here are all the preorder links:

Here's the promo copy for my novella:
When she jumped off a Ferris wheel in Central Park and survived, Claire Bennet changed the world. Now "Evos" - Evolved Humans - are exposed.

The fifth in the "Heroes Reborn" event series of six short thrillers based on the fascinating characters and rich mythology of NBC's world-wide hit TV series "Heroes", and the highly anticipated "Heroes Reborn". The new season picks up five years after the finale of the original series and finds those with special powers in a precarious and dangerous world where they are feared, persecuted and attacked.

Current Mood: happy happy
Current Music: "Don't Stop" by Fleetwood Mac

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So way back in June when I turned in the first draft of Stargate SG-1: Kali's Wrath, it came back from the editor, the charming and delightful Sally Malcolm, with the news that it was too short. Now, as many of my loyal readers know, my books tend toward the short -- most of my novels are between 50,000 and 70,000 words. It's just the way I write. But it turns out that the word count for the Stargate novels is contractually mandated between Fandemonium and MGM, and I needed to up the word count for it to be published as a novel (the length I was at meant they could only do it as an eBook-only novella).

The last few days, therefore, were spent adding just under 15,000 words to the thing in order to bring it up to speed. This was actually better for the novel in the end: there's a new chapter that's all Daniel Jackson's POV, there's some sequences that are more detailed, and there's an entire chapter that's a flashback to when the Goa'uld ruled the Earth. Fun stuff. (Adding entertainment to the process was that I've been sick the past couple days. I'm feeling better today, though still not 100%.....)

Anyhow, today is finally doing the delayed TOS Rewatch for "The City on the Edge of Forever," which will go up tomorrow, alongside the announcement of what my new Friday rewatch will be now that the Stargate Rewatch has come to an end.

Meantime, I got positive feedback on an original novella proposal from three of the four people who have to approve it (still awaiting the fourth, but he's on vacation), which will be fantastic if it goes through. My Heroes Reborn novella has been approved by my editor and the main licensing person, but there are other licensing hurdles to jump over. With luck that will happen soon.

Next week, I dive full-tilt boogie into Book 2 of the Trilogy I Still Can't Talk About Yet, which is due, uh, soon. And somewhere in there I have two short stories and two novellas to write. (The former two are the waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay overdue Kickstarter story and "Send in the Clones" for The Side of Good/The Side of Evil, the latter two are pseudonymous tales I can't talk about.)

This weekend, Meredith is coming up for a visit, and there will be baseball (we're attending the Yankees-White Sox game Saturday afternoon) and culture (we're taking my parents to the Cloisters Sunday morning).

Current Mood: tired tired
Current Music: "Lions" by Dire Straits

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Hey look, it's an LJ meme! Been a while.......

A- Age: 46

B- Biggest Fear: Being physically restrained.

C- Current Time: 9.18am

D- Drink you last had: COFFEE!!!!!

E- Easiest Person To Talk to: wrenn .

F- Favorite Song: "Telegraph Road" by Dire Straits.

G- Ghosts, are they real: Of course not.

H- Hometown: New York City.

I- In love with: See "E."

J- Jealous Of: No one. Jealousy is a waste of energy.

K- Killed Someone?: Only fictional characters.

L- Last time you cried?: In August. I'd rather not say why.

M- Middle Name: Robert Andreassi.

N- Number of Siblings: Only child.

O- One Wish: Our income level to increase dramatically.

P- Person who you last called: Glenn Hauman Saturday night when we were coordinating who was picking up whom for poker night.

Q- Question you're always asked: "Where do you get your ideas?"

R- Reason to smile: See "E" and "I."

S- Song last sang: "SPQR" with wrenn when they were playing "YMCA" at Camden Yards last Tuesday, because we are silly.

T- Time you woke up: 8.55am

U- Underwear Color: White.

V- Vacation Destination: Key West, if all goes according to plan, in April.

W- Worst Habit: Procrastinating working by doing silly online memes.

X- X-Rays you've had: Teeth, and also my foot once when I sprained my ankle.

Y- Your favorite food: Steak.

Z- Zodiac Sign: Aries.

Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: "Rocks on the Road" by Jethro Tull

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Today Wrenn and I had a date afternoon, something we both needed as we're overwhelmed by freelance work. We went off to City Island, which is a tiny island to the east of the Bronx that serves as a seaport and little fishing village. It has excellent seafood, great restaurants, adorable little houses, and a ton of little shops.

About 30 years ago, my parents and I used to go to City Island regularly, often going to a restaurant for dinner and then to either the Black Whale or the Hippie's Place for dessert. When the Hippie's Place closed its doors, we stuck with the Black Whale.

We stopped going when my mother developed allergies to most seafood, and aside from one of Wrenn's birthday dinners a few years ago, we haven't really gone. It's kind of out of the way -- which is part of its charm -- but Wrenn wanted to go, and so did I.

It's fascinating to see what's changed and what hasn't. The general feel of the island is the same -- feels like a tiny fishing village that somehow is still part of New York City. There are many fewer little shops and a depressing number of empty storefronts.

But some things are the same. The Black Whale is still there, and virtually unchanged from three decades ago. Just like I did then, I had a root beer float. Across the street is Hawkins Park, which has a dolphin statue that is perfect for little kids to climb all over (I used to then; two kids ran into the park and did so while Wrenn and I sat there). The World War I memorial is at the park's center, old enough that it was still just called "the World War."

We wandered from one end of the island to the other (it's less than half a square mile in size), taking in the views on the ends, eating oysters and calamari at Sammy's, sitting in Hawkins Park, and having dessert at the Black Whale. It was a nice, pleasant break for both of us, just enjoying each other's company and having a mental health afternoon.

Here are some pictures:

Two views of the Throg's Neck Bridge from the south end of the island.

Boats near the south end of the island.

One of the sealion statues in Hawkins Park.

The World War I memorial in Hawkins Park.

Me and the dolphin statue in Hawkins Park.

Another shot of the dolphin statue in Hawkins Park.

Wrenn sitting in Hawkins Park playing Ingress.

The late-afternoon sky over the north end of the island.

Views of the water from the north end of the island.

A seagull hangin' out at the north end of the island.

The Crab Shanty, still pretty much the same as it was thirty years ago.

The Black Whale, also still pretty much the same as it was thirty years ago.

Me fondling my phone in the Black Whale.

My root beer float at the Black Whale.
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It's the 20th anniversary of Xena, Warrior Princess, believe it or not, and we celebrated the occasion at Dragon Con with a panel looking back on the series. Besides me, there was Jessa Phillips (Good to be a Geek, Revolution SF), Tegan Hendrickson (JustTegan.com, Revolution SF), and Anomaly's Sue Kisenwether to talk chakrams, Gabrielle, Ares, Dahok, redemption, Joxer the Mighty, and tons more.

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Current Music: "Telegraph Road" by Dire Straits

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The Stargate Rewatch comes to a close with a look at the one-season animated series, Infinity.

An excerpt:
This could have been a fun series about a bunch of Air Force cadets on the run, being held together by the solid Bonner. But it isn’t. Mostly it looks like your standard crummy 1990s cartoon with adequate hand-drawn animation, with bits of really awful CGI animation mixed in for fancy stuff, and mediocre voice talent that isn’t putting their best effort into it. (Notable exceptions to the latter are Jim Byrnes in various roles, who actually gives his characters some depth, and Mark Acheson as Da’kyll, who goes completely over the top with his voice work, making the Tlak’kahn warlord a delightful combination of Clancy Brown’s The Kurgan in Highlander mixed with Shredder from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon.)

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Current Music: "Highway in the Wind" by Arlo Guthrie

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Okay, the people have spoken, and of the five possible covers for the omnibus of Cayo Hueso that will be part of next month's Story Bundle, everyone seems to only like the first two, though nobody liked the fonts I used for them.

So now we've narrowed it down to these two:

Thoughts in the comments, please............

Current Mood: awake awake
Current Music: "Baby I Love You" by the Yayhoos

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In the 1990s and early 2000s, a bunch of us would gather together on the North Fork of Long Island and do a weekend of touring of the wineries thereabouts. We kind of fell out of the habit in the early 2000s, at least partly because the North Fork started getting stupid popular and it became harder to arrange reasonably.

This was from our gathering in spring 2001. Everyone who attended is shown with the notable exception of Peter Liverakos, who took the picture.

Back row: Alexandra Honigsberg and David Honigsberg.
Penultimate row: James Hartley and Lisa Sullivan.
Middle row: Marina Frants, Brandy Hauman, Laura Anne Gilman, Esther Friesner, and Walter Stutzman.
Front row: Glenn Hauman, Pete Wheeler Lucienne Diver, Ty Wheeler, and me.

Marina and I had split up by this point, but we were still friends (still are, in fact). Laura Anne and Peter were still together, then, and David was still alive (he died in 2007). Ty is a teenager now and would probably be embarrassed at his literally infantile behavior. *grin*

Current Mood: nostalgic nostalgic
Current Music: "I'm Still Standing" by Elton John

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So I'm going to be part of one of the Story Bundles that the good folks at WordFire Press put together, where you get a bunch of themed stories. I'm actually doing the three-part Cayo Hueso story, which was originally released as three eBooks by Plus One Press in anticipation of the release of Ragnarok and Roll: Tales of Cassie Zukav, Weirdness Magnet, in which all three parts appeared.

So the story needs a new cover -- and I've done five. *headdesk* I can't decide among the five of them, so I'm putting it to the Internet to decide. Which of these do you prefer? (All of them make use of pictures either I or Wrenn took when we went to Key West in 2013.)

#1: Hemingway House

#2: bar interior

#3: sunset #1:

#4: sunset #2:

#5: sunset #3:

Poll #2022430 Pick the cover to Cayo Hueso

Which cover do you think is best?

#1 Hemingway House
#2 bar interior
#3 sunset #1
#4 sunset #2
#5 sunset #3
I don't like any of them
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We meet the Klingons for the first time, primarily in the person of the amazing John Colicos as Kor. The TOS Rewatch goes on an "Errand of Mercy."

An excerpt:
But the standout is, of course, John Colicos. There’s a belief among a segment of the Trek fan base that views the Klingons as changed significantly between the original series and the various spinoffs, that they went from being thugs to warriors, but that belief only works if you ignore the character of Kor. Colicos gives us the blueprint for every Klingon that came afterward, and everything from Worf’s tactical acumen on TNG and DS9 to the Kahless clone’s declarations of the joy of battle and combat in TNG‘s “Rightful Heir” to Martok’s dignity on DS9 can trace its roots back to what Colicos does in this episode.

Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: "The Seven" by Boogie Knights

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Wrenn and I are off to Bawlmer to watch the Orioles play the Red Sox. Wrenn has never been to Camden Yards, so this should be fun. We're just daytripping, as we have tons to do in town tomorrow, but this will be a fun road trip with baseball! Stress-free baseball, too, since the O's and Sawx are basically fighting for the cellar, and unlike last time I did this, I can root for the home team, since, as a Yankee fan, I must root against Boston.

Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: "Blood is Thicker than Water" by Wyclef Jean

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Thanks to my work with GISHWHES, in concert with my amazing fellows in the most abnosomous Team Inevitable Innuendo (the fruits of those labors can be seen here), I have earned the following:

It also came with this letter:
Most Esteemed and Venerable Gisher, Keith,

We are thrilled to announce that because of your hard work, artistry, lack of shame, and selfless community devotion, you have been singled out for the most prestigious honor we at Gishwhes have the power to bestow on an individual: a Doctorate* of Gishology.

Simply put, this degree qualifies you as an expert in all things Gishwhes, marks you as an individual unfit for living in the mundane realm of normalcy and distinguishes you as someone of extreme and meritorious weirdness for whom the world is a playground of limitless possibility.

Congratulations, Keith.

Attached please find the digital copy of your degree, which we expect you to print in hardcopy and display in a place of honor and distinction. Last year we were told Gishers hung them in dorm rooms, offices, above fireplaces, and, in special cases, on the bowl side of their toilet tanks.

Thank you for making Gishwhes 2015 a mind-boggling standout. To assist you in remembering the Hunt for a lifetime, the Gishwhes Schwag Shwop is now officially open to everyone! This year’s schwag is the best we’ve ever had: We offer the Limited Edition Coffee Table Book (rife with staggering photos—perhaps from your team), a Dinomite plushie, abnosome t-shirts and other baubles. It’s all at your fingertips: http://shop.gishwhes.com

We hope to see you in the pandemonium of next year’s Gishwhes: “Gishwhes — The Return of the Reawakened Part VI Beginnings Redeux;” or, as we like to abbreviate it around Gish Headquarters: “Gishwhes! Gishwhes! Gishwhes! Gishwhes! Gishwhes! Gishwhes!”

Your not-terribly-humble-but-always-devoted servant,

Misha C.

* This Doctorate in no way qualifies you to do or be anything other than your own incredibly weird, kind and abnosome self... which is all you need in life for happiness, success and bountiful kale harvests.

Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: the Yankees-Rays game on YES

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