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KRAD's Inaccurate Guide to Life
ramblings from a mad fedora'd writer
So New York State has a thing whereby if you don't have a formal rental lease, you are considered "month to month." That's the situation I've been in in this apartment building (first on the third floor from 2001-2008, then on the second floor from 2008 to the present), and it has its good points and bad points.

One of the latter is that the landlord can announce that the lease is cancelled with only 30 days' notice.

Last Thursday, we were given notice that our lease was cancelled and we must vacate by 31 August.


Just as things have been settling financially for us for the first time since Wrenn's contract gig ended in 2013, this happens.

On the other hand, two major expenses have been removed for the nonce: we have postponed our wedding, so we are no longer getting married on 17 September as planned. We're looking now at April 2017 for the new marriage commencement date.

The other, sadly, is that I have cancelled my appearance at Dragon Con 2016. The timing is just awful, as Labor Day weekend is a time that will be required for moving and/or unpacking.

We are now frantically checking real estate ads, talking to people, and generally running in circles and screaming and shouting -- plus, y'know, getting work done, seeing as how we've both got deadlines that don't care about our personal crises. We're looking at a place in our neighborhood this afternoon, and have a ton of other feelers out as well.

Please all of you send happy thoughts in our direction. The next month is going to be insane..............................

Current Mood: crazy crazy
Current Music: "Horace and Pete" by Paul Simon

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Now that the movie's been out for a few days, here's my fully spoiled review of Star Trek Beyond on Tor.com, done in the style of the rewatches.

An excerpt:
However, the best parts of the entire film are the scenes with Spock and McCoy. Zachary Quinto and Karl Urban have both done a great job filling the shoes of Leonard Nimoy and DeForest Kelley, but Urban has been criminally underused to date. This film finally rectifies that, and gives us the Spock-McCoy banter that was one of the best parts of the original series and their followup movies. One of the things that gave me hope for this movie in the trailers was the scene where McCoy says, “At least I won’t die alone,” then Spock is beamed away, and McCoy grumbles, “Well, that’s just typical,” and I’m pleased to report that that’s just the tip of the iceberg. In particular, the horseshit conversation is the highlight of the entire film.

Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: "Just a Little Favor for the Kinkster" by Mojo Nixon

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Dayton Ward explains it all.......

Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: "Kissing Willie" by Jethro Tull

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I'm officially an eight-time loser! The Scribe Awards were announced by the International Association of Media Tie-in Writers tonight at a panel at San Diego Comic-Con. My short story, "Back in El Paso My Life Would be Worthless" in The X-Files: Trust No One, did not win, probably because the judges got exhausted just from reading the title.....

Particular congratulations to two of my closest friends and most awesome colleagues, David Mack and Dayton Ward, for their novel wins!

Here's the full list:

Best Novel--Speculative
Star Trek: The Next Generation: Armageddon's Arrow by Dayton Ward

Best Novel--General
24: Live Another Day: Rogue by David Mack

Best Adapted Novel
MANOS: The Hands of Fate by Stephen D. Sullivan

Best Short Story
"Fallout" by Mickey Spillane and Max Allan Collins (The Strand)

Best Audio
Doctor Who: "The Red Lady" by John Dorney

Again, congrats to the winners!

Current Mood: disappointed disappointed
Current Music: "Back Street Beachhouse Back in Business Blues" by Cats Laughing

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On the last night of the Republican National Convention -- which has been a true embarrassment in every possible sense of the word, from the legions of Republican politicians who announced that they were too busy washing their hair, or whatever, to attend to the hysterical nonsense speeches by a series of washed-up actors and washed-up politicians to the multiple examples of plagiarism in speeches by the nominee's family members -- Jon Stewart popped into The Late Show with Stephen Colbert to do what he does best, and what we've horribly missed since he retired from The Daily Show.

Current Mood: pissed off pissed off
Current Music: "Just Came Down for the Weekend" by Michael McCloud

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My spoiler-free review of Star Trek Beyond is now up on Tor.com!

An excerpt:
However, nice visuals and good acting are old hat for Bad Robot Trek films, but what’s been missing is a script that isn’t dumber than a box of hammers. Well, encased construction tools can take heart in the fact that they get the top dumb spot once again, as the script by Simon Pegg and Doug Jung is actually good!

Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: "The Crush" by the John Hiatt Band & Ry Cooder

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Kirk vs. Kang to the death -- and beyond! The TOS Rewatch experiences the "Day of the Dove."

An excerpt:
One of Kang’s officers tortures Chekov until Kirk gives in and agrees to call the ship. Kang urges Kirk not to try anything crazy, and Kirk says he’ll beam them on board—once there, no tricks. Kang fails his saving throw versus “clever wordplay” and agrees. Kirk orders Spock to beam everyone up in a wide field, but also covertly signals him. Scotty beams the landing party up, but holds everyone not in the party in the transporter buffer until Johnson can summon two more security guards. Kang and his people materialize and are taken prisoner. Kirk also beams the remaining survivors off of Kang’s disabled ship, including his wife and science officer, Mara. Mara expects them to be tortured, but Kirk surprises them by confining them to the crew lounge and ordering the food synthesizers to be programmed to suit their needs. (Given what we found out about Klingon food in TNG‘s “A Matter of Honor” and beyond, it’s probably for the best that we didn’t get a lunch scene.)

Current Mood: geeky geeky
Current Music: "Get Back" by Paul McCartney

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My World of Warcraft novel Cycle of Hatred is my most successful book, which I know has a lot more to do with the logo on top of the front cover than the byline on the bottom of it, but it's still nice to see that it's getting readers -- a decade after its release, the book is still in print -- and I just came across this nice review by "Sharp" on the Into the Dragon's Cave blog of the book!

Money quote:
If you’re a fan of Warcraft and you want to learn more about this world or your favourite characters, that’s the book for you. Probably the best Warcraft novel I’ve ever read. If you’re new to this universe, I think this is a good place to start. Cycle of Hatred does a nice job in introducing you to the world, characters and previous events.

Racial conflict is the only deeper theme of this book, besides that it is a short, simple and enjoyable story. Longtime fans of Warcraft will find familiar characters and places, newcomers - a fun story about magic and demons. I enjoyed the style and narration of Mr. DeCandido, I didn’t find the book boring. It’s definitely worth checking out.

Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: "Private Investigations" by Dire Straits

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I will be the Author Guest of Honor at Ro-Con 2 in Mystic, Connecticut this coming weekend. I will be selling and signing my books, and doing some programming. Here's my schedule:

8-9pm: Keith R.A. DeCandido Reading -- I'll be reading from one of my upcoming works (Presentations Room)
10-11pm: "Lake Geneva, 200 Years Later," w/Mario Di Giacomo and Kristi Petersen Schoonover (Panel Room)

11am-noon: practical self defense workshop (Panel Room)
2-3pm: "Writing the Cross-Genre Novel," w/Kate Kaynak and Roberta Rogow (Panel Room)

I have nothing scheduled for Sunday, though there's a panel called "Adapting Works of Fiction into Screen or Stage Format ... and Vice-Versa" that I may crash................

Hope to see folks there!

Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: "Hazel" by Bob Dylan & The Band

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Batman's cowl turns pink! And other stuff, too, involving the Mad Hatter, skeletons, rubies, and such, but mostly: the cowl turns pink. The Bat-rewatch does "The Contaminated Cowl"/"The Mad Hatter Runs Afoul."

An excerpt:
Nothing in this story makes any damn sense. The Mad Hatter only seems to steal seven hundred hat boxes so that Batman can know he’s at large again. He goes to all the trouble to steal the Hatfield Ruby, even though it turns out to be a fake. He sprays Batman’s cowl with radioactive spray, which somehow only affects the cowl and not the cape (because that’s still blue). Why does Batman make the world think he’s dead? What purpose does it serve? It’s obviously nothing more than an annoyance to him, based on how he responds to Harriet’s mourning, so why even do it in the first place? Also, why are the skeletons only wearing underwear, capes, and masks? Where’s the rest of the costumes? After making a point of making it clear that Batman has no spare cowls, we then discover that he has two—one in the Batmobile (which goes on the skeleton) and one under the cowl he’s currently wearing. But wait, if he was wearing it under the contaminated cowl, wouldn’t it be contaminated, too, that being, y’know, how radiation works? Also shouldn’t Batman and Robin know more about radiation than they do, what with there being an atomic reactor in the Batcave?

Current Mood: tired tired
Current Music: "My Baby" by Elvis Presley

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From Shore Leave 24 in 2002, me, Marco Palmieri, and Jeffrey Lang doing a joint reading from one of the works in the "DS9 Relaunch," the post-"What You Leave Behind" DS9 fiction that Marco was, at the time, in charge of, and to which Jeff and I both contributed.

Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: "Darkest Hour" by Arlo Guthrie

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Eric Clapton's stellar rendition of an old blues song with just an acoustic guitar. They didn't call him "God" for nothin'...............

Current Mood: impressed impressed
Current Music: "Key to the Highway" by Eric Clapton

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As ever, I will be at Shore Leave in Cockeysville, Maryland this weekend. I haven't missed a Shore Leave this millennium........

Here's my schedule:

10pm-midnight: Meet the Pros, Hunt/Valley corridor, w/all the author guests -- we'll be debuting Altered States of the Union and I'll have a bunch of my books for sale

11am-noon: Boogie Knights concert, Valley
1-2pm: "When to Break Your Writing Instructor's Rules," Chase, w/Lorraine Anderson, Derek Tyler Attico, Michael Critzer, Jo Graham, Susan Olesen, and David Harten Wilson
3-4pm: "The International Association of Media Tie-in Writers," Chase, w/Rigel Ailur, Lorraine Anderson, Kathleen O. David, Robert Greenberger, and Richard C. White
4-5pm: "The Freelancer's Dilemma," Chase, w/Andrew Hiller, Jeffrey Lang, Aaron Rosenberg, Melissa Scott, and Steven H. Wilson
5-6pm: practical self-defense workshop, Concierge

11am-noon: "Step One: Writing! Step Three: Published!" Derby, w/Mary Fan, Stephen Kozeniewski, Jeffrey Lang, T.J. Perkins, and Aaron Rosenberg
12-1pm: "Stargate in Literature & Media," Salon F, w/Jo Graham, Aaron Rosenberg, and Melissa Scott

Looking forward to seeing folks there!

Current Mood: happy happy
Current Music: "Leopard Skin Pillbox Hat" by John Mellencamp

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McCoy hits all the clichés! He has a year to live, he falls in love, and he helps save a generation ship from crashing into a planet. The TOS Rewatch knows that life is a lie "For the World is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky."

An excerpt:
This script would have benefitted greatly by aping the structure of another third-season love-story-in-an-hour episode about a planetary collision, to wit, “The Paradise Syndrome.” (This despite the latter episode being inferior to this one.) The episode would have worked far better by taking more story time in the hour, giving McCoy and Natira’s relationship a chance to grow the way Kirk’s and Miramanee’s did, and have the Enterprise‘s efforts to get Yonada back on course take a certain amount of time and effort.

Current Mood: busy busy
Current Music: "Piece of Cake" by Jethro Tull

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Mark Knopfler goes bluesy...........

Current Mood: tired tired
Current Music: "I Used to Could" by Mark Knopfler

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For the monthly roundup of books for the "Her Commonplace Blog" site, there's a nice bunch of reviews, including one of Thor: Dueling with Giants.

Money quote:
Anyway, the dialogue in this novel is kind of ‘Shakespearean’, if you get what I mean. The plot itself was entertaining enough. It’s just a usual kind of plot where Thor is super headstrong and wants to be DA BEST and Loki is of course always angry and scheming, so he sets plans in motion to get his brother all kinds of fucked up.

It’s a very typical Loki vs. Aesir type story. Long story short, if you really love Thor comics and want something quick and easy to read for like a long bus ride or whatever, then pick this up. Might even be a good book for middle school kids who are getting into superheroes!

Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: "Portland Town" by Arlo Guthrie

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A version of a couple things I posted on Facebook (that prompted massive conversation there)............

It's been announced that Hikaru Sulu will be established as gay -- or, more accurately, having a husband and daughter -- in Star Trek Beyond, partly in tribute to George Takei (who himself thinks it's a terrible idea, as he always played Sulu as straight). Here's the thing -- he's the only character among the Big Seven who can be so established, because he's the only character whose heterosexuality (or, at least, interest in women) wasn't made clear. Chekov had the yeoman in "The Apple" and his old girlfriend in "The Way to Eden." Scotty had women he was fond of in "Who Mourns for Adonais?" and "The Lights of Zetar," not to mention his flirting with Uhura in Star Trek V: The Final Frontier. As for Uhura, there's also her ideal man shown by the salt vampire in "The Man Trap." McCoy had the yeoman in "Shore Leave," Natira in "For the World is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky," his ex-girlfriend in "The Man Trap," and his ex-wife, not canonically established until the 2009 Star Trek. Spock had Leila Kalomi in "This Side of Paradise," the Romulan Commander in "The Enterprise Incident," and Droxine in "The Cloud Minders," not to mention T'Pring in "Amok Time." And Kirk is the most heterosexual character ever.

But Sulu? Nothin'. He's the only one of the six main male characters in the entire history of the TOS crew to never be given a love interest. Closest we came is in "Mirror, Mirror" when the alternate-universe Sulu hit on Uhura, but that's the Mirror Universe, and for all we know, he pulled the same shit on Chekov.

There are bits and pieces here and there, of course: Sulu was just as affected as the other men on board by Mudd's women in their eponymous episode and by Ilia in Star Trek: The Motion Picture, but both cases involved chemical pheremonic enhancement, natural for Ilia, artificial for Mudd's "cargo." There's the animated episode "The Magics of Megas-Tu" in which Sulu conjures a woman and kisses her on the bridge, but that entire episode is full of nonsense, and the animated series' canonical status is variable in any case.

My favorite is the argument "he has a daughter!" from Star Trek Generations, as if that proves he's straight, as if homosexual people can't possibly have children, which would be news to (to name three prominent gay men in the nerdy community) David Gerrold, Neil Patrick Harris, and Samuel R. Delany and their kids.

Many are dismissing this particular revelation as yet another case of the Bad Robot folks "not getting" and "rewriting" Trek, even though establishing Sulu as having a husband changes nothing we saw on screen between Sulu's first appearance in Trek's first season in 1966 and his last in the Voyager episode "Flashback" in 1996 (or, for that matter, in the Bad Robot movies of 2009 and 2013).

One thing that those folks will cite as another example is the Spock-Uhura relationship, as it isn't based on anything that happened in the original series!!!!!!

Except it totally is. One thing I have realized in doing my weekly rewatch of TOS for Tor.com the last year or so is that they did not pull Spock-Uhura out of their asses. There is evidence to be found in "The Man Trap" when Uhura's asking Spock about Vulcan, in "Who Mourns for Adonais?" when Uhura's performing repairs, and in "Is There in Truth No Beauty?" when the Spock/Kollos gestalt quotes Byron's "She Walks in Beauty" at Uhura.

But the best evidence that Spock and Uhura were an item in the original series was in "Charlie X." Here's what I wrote in my rewatch of that episode:
The mess hall scene when Uhura sings along with Spock’s Vulcan lyre playing is Exhibit B in the evidence that Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman did not pull the Spock-Uhura romance out of their asses for the 2009 Star Trek and Star Trek Into Darkness. I can see the pair of them rewatching the original series and getting to this scene.

KURTZMAN (not a Trek fan, pauses after Uhura’s done singing): So, those two are fucking, right?

ORCI (a longtime Trek fan): Of course not. What are you, nuts? Spock would never...

KURTZMAN: Seriously? They’re totally fucking. I mean, it’s 1966, so they can only show much, but still. Watch the scene again.

ORCI (yanks the remote out of Kurtzman’s hands and rewinds, then watches the scene again): Holy shit, they totally are!

It is my fond hope that people come out of reading my rewatch realizing that a) Jim Kirk was NOTNOTNOTNOT a maverick who disobeyed orders and went his own way and did what he wanted and b) that the Spock-Uhura romance is a perfectly legit interpretation.

Current Mood: nerdy nerdy
Current Music: "Blowing in the Wind" by Bob Dylan & The Band

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It's the Catwoman/Sandman team-up that nobody demanded! (Least of all the original scripter...) The Bat-rewatch does "The Sandman Cometh"/"The Catwoman Goeth."

An excerpt:
It’s not all bad. Spring Byington is a delight as Spaghetti, Michael Rennie brings a certain charm to the Sandman, and the story is generally well populated with capable women, much more so than we usually see in a show that tends to embrace the sexism of its period with both arms. But overall, the story is a mess. It’s unclear what Catwoman brings to the table that necessitates the team-up. If the Sandman’s plan is to marry Spaghetti, why bother taking pictures of her ledger? Why set up Batman trying to gain Catwoman’s cooperation if they don’t need it and will just arrest her in any case?

Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: "Heading for the Light" by the Traveling Wilburys

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When my character, while talking about New York City, says that "I heard this was a helluva town," and he and the person he's talking to go on to continue to riff on the song "New York, New York" from On the Town, please do not change it to "hell of a town," especially since the actual lyrics from the actual song written by Betty Comden and Adolph Green are "helluva town."

Also: when my first-person narrator indulges in a metaphor, please do not change it to a bland description without the jokey metaphor because your way is more grammatically correct, as you then drain the personality out of my first-person narrator.

(I generally love copy editors, they are wonderful people, and this one has also caught some major fuckups on my part, but you don't edit dialogue the same way you edit narration, and you don't edit first-person narration the same way you edit third-person narration, and you don't edit fiction the same way you edit nonfiction.)


Current Mood: grumpy grumpy
Current Music: "Hill Farmer's Blues" by Mark Knopfler

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Nothing changes.

A black man was shot by cops even though he hadn't actually done anything wrong. He took out his wallet so he could identify himself to the cops (who thought he matched the description of a serial rapist). They opened fire and shot 41 times.

This happened in the Bronx in 1999.

Nothing changes.

Bruce Springsteen wrote this song for Amadou Diallo. It applies just as much to Alton Sterling and Philado Castile.

Current Mood: sad sad
Current Music: "41 Shot (American Skin)" by Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band

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Back in 2001, my first Trek novel, Diplomatic Implausibility, was published. It featured Worf's first mission as an ambassador following the DS9 finale, and also showcased a Klingon ship, the I.K.S. Gorkon, captained by Klag, a guest character from a most excellent second-season TNG episode "A Matter of Honor." I also brought the ship and characters back in The Brave and the Bold duology in 2002.

In 2003, I was given the green light to do two books in a new series focused on the Klingon ship, the I.K.S. Gorkon series. It only lasted three books (the third came out in 2005), with an attempted rebranding in 2008.

Jim Arrowood's only recently discovered the adventures of Klag and the gang, and he just reviewed the first Gorkon book, A Good Day to Die, on his blog.

Money quote:
As I have mentioned in previous reviews of this author’s works, chief among Keith’s many strengths is his ability to bring characters alive and make them seem like real people. Although A Good Day To Die is obviously a work of fiction, it seems real as one reads mainly owing to the vivid character development.

Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: "Give Me Back My Wig" by Interstate Brickface

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Rosie Amber has given my Stargate SG-1 novel Kali's Wrath 5 out of 5 stars in a review on her blog! Hooray!

Money quote:
A rescue mission is planned with the added bonus of help from the Tok’ra and Master Bra’tac making this an action packed episode. There were clever back stories informing the reader about the System Lord Kali and how she fit into the many Goa’uld leaders, as well as enough background on the lead characters for first time readers to feel involved, but not too much to bore dedicated fans of the TV series.

Current Mood: happy happy
Current Music: "Baba O'Riley" by Roger Daltry & the Chieftains

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We had a grand old time at InConJunction XXXVI. I was Author GoH at InCon XXX in 2010, and both we and the con wanted me back, and we were finally able to make it happen this year. And it'll happen again next year, as it was formally announced at closing ceremonies that next year, I will be Toastmaster.

The weekend included catching up with old friends, including Farscape creator/Media GoH (and my collaborator on the Farscape comics) Rockne S. O'Bannon (and also meeting his son Eric), Helen, Marceille, Joe, Kat, Dawn, Lexi, Lisa, Emily, and the magnificent crew of the U.B.S. Indycent of Barfleet. I am now actually a member of the Indycent crew, which is a great honor.......

I also got to meet new people, sell tons of books, do nifty panels (on Farscape with Rockne, as well as one on the 50th anniversary of the Adam West Batman, one on morality in Star Trek's Federation, and one on writing combat scenes in fiction), and generally have a fantastic time.

We're off this morning to visit relatives in western Pennsylvania, and also relax a bit at the B&B in Clarion that we love (both Wrenn and I have deadlines that don't give a shit that we were at a con). We're back home Wednesday afternoon/evening.

Current Mood: tired tired
Current Music: "Why Aye Man" by Mark Knopfler

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"We hold these truths to be self-evident," they said, "that all men are created equal." Strange as it may seem, that was the first time in history that anyone had ever bothered to write that down.
---President Bartlet,
The West Wing

The Declaration of Independence

IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
    He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
    He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
    He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
    He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
    He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
    He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
    He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
    He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
    He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
    He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
    He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
    He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
    He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
    For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
    For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
    For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
    For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
    For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
    For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
    For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
    For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
    For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
    He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
    He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
    He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
    He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
    He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

Button Gwinnett
Lyman Hall
George Walton
North Carolina:
William Hooper
Joseph Hewes
John Penn
South Carolina:
Edward Rutledge
Thomas Heyward, Jr.
Thomas Lynch, Jr.
Arthur Middleton
John Hancock
Samuel Chase
William Paca
Thomas Stone
Charles Carroll of Carrollton
George Wythe
Richard Henry Lee
Thomas Jefferson
Benjamin Harrison
Thomas Nelson, Jr.
Francis Lightfoot Lee
Carter Braxton
Robert Morris
Benjamin Rush
Benjamin Franklin
John Morton
George Clymer
James Smith
George Taylor
James Wilson
George Ross
Caesar Rodney
George Read
Thomas McKean
New York:
William Floyd
Philip Livingston
Francis Lewis
Lewis Morris
New Jersey:
Richard Stockton
John Witherspoon
Francis Hopkinson
John Hart
Abraham Clark
New Hampshire:
Josiah Bartlett
William Whipple
Samuel Adams
John Adams
Robert Treat Paine
Elbridge Gerry
Rhode Island:
Stephen Hopkins
William Ellery
Roger Sherman
Samuel Huntington
William Williams
Oliver Wolcott
New Hampshire:
Matthew Thornton

Happy Independence Day, everyone!

Current Mood: patriotic
Current Music: still "This is Not Love"

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The Puzzler proves a very weak Riddler substitute, thought Maurice Evans does the best he can. The Bat-rewatch does "The Puzzles are Coming"/"The Duo is Slumming."

An excerpt:
On the other hand, that Shakespearean bent is a big source of the story’s charm. Maurice Evans does a delightful job of delivering the Elizabethan-era quotes that are part and parcel of his dialogue effortlessly and perfectly. (He does far better than Adam West, whose mannered pseudo-British affect when he quotes the Bard is actively painful to listen to.) In addition, Paul Smith’s delightfully over-the-top Hughesian take on Knab is a delight, from his constant harping on his many monopolies to his phone call interruptions during the Monopoly game with Puzzler.

Current Mood: amused amused
Current Music: "This is Not Love" by Jethro Tull

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