First, from Tony Richardson, fullback for the Minnesota Vikings:
I don't want to move at this point in my career. I had a good meeting with the owners. I've got some gas left in the wheel and want to keep playing.
One wonders what's in his tank, if he puts gas in the wheel....
And from St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Chris Carpenter on when he might return from surgery:
The question is whether it's going to be before the All-Star break, after the All-Star break or somewhere in between.
Those are indeed the options, yes.....
Edited to add: It should be noted that what's hilarious about these quotes isn't just that Richardson and Carpenter said dumb things, but that the "journalists" interviewing them -- John Clayton of ESPN.com for Richardson and St. Louis Post-Dispatch reporter Joe Strauss for Carpenter -- who just dumped the quotes into their articles either on purpose to make their subject look stupid or (more likely) because they didn't realize just what they said. Either way, it's yet another notch on the bedpost of incompetence that is 90% of sports "journalism."